It's hard to believe that it's actually over. Well, the dying part is, anyway. It seems like I've spent so much time over the last few years ruminating over life, writing about that delicate balance between sickness and health, and the things our friends can teach us that we never thought were possible... And Elaine has been such a big inspiration for all of that. It's very disorienting to feel so overwhelmingly sad and unbelievably grateful at the same time... It would be a lie to say this whole thing hasn't been heartbreaking, and that in spite of having months to learn how to grieve and say our goodbyes, that the loss still stung any less when it happened. But in spite of all of that, words can't begin to express what an honor it was to have known someone that was so difficult to say goodbye to.
It has taken me a while to come to terms with the fact that some of the best people don't get to stay with us as long as we'd like. But they walk into our lives in one way or another and in the middle of a bunch of ordinary days, they manage to change us. It's really no wonder then, why it hurts so much when they have to leave.
Under the disguise of a bunch of everyday conversations and emails, travels and laughter and evenings with the people she loved the most, Elaine managed to affect us all. She was one of those wonderful few who manages to leave this world, and the people who knew her, better than how she found them. And while I have tears, I can't help but feel so lucky to have even had the chance to spend a few precious moments with her. To travel through Europe with her. To laugh and brunch and dance and learn from her. I know, without a doubt, that I am a better person for having known Elaine. And I look forward to the day when I get to tell my children about our fabulous friend who managed to do so much with just 53 years.
Elaine taught me what it means to make the most out of life. That it's too short not to travel or drink wine or spend time with genuinely good friends. She taught me that life is far too precious to waste on bad thoughts, even when you're running out of time. She has shown me the some of the strongest, most beautiful people I'll ever know are the ones who have stared adversity in the face and managed to come out the other side still standing. And still smiling.
I can only hope that I can be as brave about my life as Elaine. That I won't be afraid to fill it with good people and curiosity and a burning desire to always experience some place new. I know there are going to be so many moments in the coming days, weeks and years, when its pretty outside or I'm thinking of Europe or I stumble across a really good friend and we share a bottle of wine, and there she'll be. And I hope that wherever she is, she knows I'm thinking of her. And that she has not been forgotten.
It has taken me a while to come to terms with the fact that some of the best people don't get to stay with us as long as we'd like. But they walk into our lives in one way or another and in the middle of a bunch of ordinary days, they manage to change us. It's really no wonder then, why it hurts so much when they have to leave.
Under the disguise of a bunch of everyday conversations and emails, travels and laughter and evenings with the people she loved the most, Elaine managed to affect us all. She was one of those wonderful few who manages to leave this world, and the people who knew her, better than how she found them. And while I have tears, I can't help but feel so lucky to have even had the chance to spend a few precious moments with her. To travel through Europe with her. To laugh and brunch and dance and learn from her. I know, without a doubt, that I am a better person for having known Elaine. And I look forward to the day when I get to tell my children about our fabulous friend who managed to do so much with just 53 years.
Elaine taught me what it means to make the most out of life. That it's too short not to travel or drink wine or spend time with genuinely good friends. She taught me that life is far too precious to waste on bad thoughts, even when you're running out of time. She has shown me the some of the strongest, most beautiful people I'll ever know are the ones who have stared adversity in the face and managed to come out the other side still standing. And still smiling.
I can only hope that I can be as brave about my life as Elaine. That I won't be afraid to fill it with good people and curiosity and a burning desire to always experience some place new. I know there are going to be so many moments in the coming days, weeks and years, when its pretty outside or I'm thinking of Europe or I stumble across a really good friend and we share a bottle of wine, and there she'll be. And I hope that wherever she is, she knows I'm thinking of her. And that she has not been forgotten.
Rest in Peace, 'Lainers. We couldn't have been more lucky.
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